Morning guys.. Its only 4 o'clock and I can't sleep.. No, actually I just woke up and can't go to sleep. Here's why..
I had a dream, more like a nightmare. I was at this field (I don't know why all my nightmares are on a field) and I saw Faris there, wearing white, not realising that I'm wearing white too.-,-. That's not the whole point.
After that, I ran to him, saying that I'm really happy to see him again. So, he smiled at me but I can see tears running down from his cheeks. When I said why, he didn't say anything. He just turn back and leave.
I thought he was mad at me (I sent him a text message saying goodbye. I was just saying goodnight actually. He got it wrong, I think). So, I tried to turn back too but my feet wanted to go and catch him again.
Suddenly, he was out of sight. I began to feel scared and lonely. Trust me, I've never had that kind of feeling in my life. I don't know how to describe the feeling actually. It was like angry, sad, dissapointed or something like that. Then, the sky turned dark and there was this HUGE tornado coming to get me. I was like, "Go ahead, take me! I don't wanna live!!".
Then, I felt someone pulled me by the arm. I realised that it was Faris. He told me, "I don't want you to leave me. I just don't want to feel down when you're gone,". WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN??! I was just smiling until I found out that I'm suffocating. I woke up, still gasping for air.. He sent me a meassage, "U needed someone to hate. Well this is me saying goodbye.". Is it me, or the nightmare is actually happening right now?
~XOXOXOX~
me and me and life
about me and my life..
Friday, June 3, 2011
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Counting The Days.. =)
What's up bloggers! As if all bloggers are reading this.. Haha, I'm so full of myself.. XD
I'm only 15 and I have to suffer everything. Love life, study, and most importantly my health condition. Its bad, really bad. Even I don't know it turns out really really bad. So, I cried almost every night. Whatever.. =)
I know I wrote about this before but that wasn't detail enough. I have a heart disease and guess what, it runs in the family! 0,o. I don't know why I'm the only who have to get this?!
Another thing that freak me is the doctor told me I might have a short life. WTF?! What kind of doctor should say anything like that?! I know what am I going through but you don't have to say "You have a SHORT LIFE!". Gosh, unsensitive much?
Everyday I felt pain. Everyday, every night, everytime I tried to breath. The pain was crazy. Sometimes I feel like stabbing my heart so that it wouldn't cause such pain anymore. But, I didn't. Mom said I have to be really strong and they are always there for me. I just love my family and friends. They are the best!
Big chances, I'll be having an operation. But knowing me, there's no way I'm gonna be in that cold operation theatre. Too much drama. Haha, get it? Operation theatre? Drama? I know you guys didn't get it. I'm a lame joker..
I'm only 15 and I have to suffer everything. Love life, study, and most importantly my health condition. Its bad, really bad. Even I don't know it turns out really really bad. So, I cried almost every night. Whatever.. =)
I know I wrote about this before but that wasn't detail enough. I have a heart disease and guess what, it runs in the family! 0,o. I don't know why I'm the only who have to get this?!
Another thing that freak me is the doctor told me I might have a short life. WTF?! What kind of doctor should say anything like that?! I know what am I going through but you don't have to say "You have a SHORT LIFE!". Gosh, unsensitive much?
Everyday I felt pain. Everyday, every night, everytime I tried to breath. The pain was crazy. Sometimes I feel like stabbing my heart so that it wouldn't cause such pain anymore. But, I didn't. Mom said I have to be really strong and they are always there for me. I just love my family and friends. They are the best!
Big chances, I'll be having an operation. But knowing me, there's no way I'm gonna be in that cold operation theatre. Too much drama. Haha, get it? Operation theatre? Drama? I know you guys didn't get it. I'm a lame joker..
Holidays.. OMG! Bored Much!
Hey yo! What's up? Hmm, I'm so bored that I don't know what to write on this precious blog of mine.. Haha, is it that precious? Yeah! XD
I'm completely psyched about the school holidays. Imagine 2 weeks doing nothing but fun! Nah, that is Phineas and Ferb's holidays. Not Sufiah's. Mine is a lot more different and less fun.. -,-
I've blow up my one week of school holidays, AT SCHOOL! Fine, its my PMR year. Have to sacrifice a little bit. I just spend ONE day only at Sunway, and that was because I wanted to meet my friend. Just that. Then, Tuesday till today, school. I can't believe I went to school during the holidays...
So, yeah. School's finally over. Now, holidays. There's nothing much I'm gonna do. Maybe spent most of the time studying (yeah right!), Facebook, blogging, music. I don't know. But I don't think I'm gonna anywhere this year. Just stuck in my house. Oh well, that doesn't mean I'm gonna study till I rot inside my room. Maybe. Haha, nah, that wouldn't happen.
Yeah, so, I have to break out now. Trying to find something good, real good to write. Something interesting. ;-). Haha. CIAO!!!
~XOXOXO~
I'm completely psyched about the school holidays. Imagine 2 weeks doing nothing but fun! Nah, that is Phineas and Ferb's holidays. Not Sufiah's. Mine is a lot more different and less fun.. -,-
I've blow up my one week of school holidays, AT SCHOOL! Fine, its my PMR year. Have to sacrifice a little bit. I just spend ONE day only at Sunway, and that was because I wanted to meet my friend. Just that. Then, Tuesday till today, school. I can't believe I went to school during the holidays...
So, yeah. School's finally over. Now, holidays. There's nothing much I'm gonna do. Maybe spent most of the time studying (yeah right!), Facebook, blogging, music. I don't know. But I don't think I'm gonna anywhere this year. Just stuck in my house. Oh well, that doesn't mean I'm gonna study till I rot inside my room. Maybe. Haha, nah, that wouldn't happen.
Yeah, so, I have to break out now. Trying to find something good, real good to write. Something interesting. ;-). Haha. CIAO!!!
~XOXOXO~
Monday, May 30, 2011
One Day With The Guy I Never Realise
Hey, today was an amazing day. I went out with my peeps, Akmal and Siva, to Sunway Pyramid. We thought of going ice skating (aka seeing me fall hard). But then, Faris came along. So, me and Faris and his friend went to watch Pirates Of The Carribean 4. It was a crazy movie, not kidding.
So, yeah. Akmal and Siva end up getting mad at me cos I didn't go for ice skating with them. Maybe they were just upset about that only. Hello, I went to eat Sushi King with them? Duh! Oh well, after that, we were walking around the place, not knowing where were we heading.
Then, I bought some cupcakes for my beloved family. And gosh! The cupcakes were so cute that I could just eat them all up. Seriously.. But, I brought back home. My friend scold me because I was eating 15 mini-cupcakes. MINI I tell you! Fine, maybe I was too overboard on the cupcakes. But who can deny such marvelous cupcakes?
~XOXOXO~
So, yeah. Akmal and Siva end up getting mad at me cos I didn't go for ice skating with them. Maybe they were just upset about that only. Hello, I went to eat Sushi King with them? Duh! Oh well, after that, we were walking around the place, not knowing where were we heading.
Then, I bought some cupcakes for my beloved family. And gosh! The cupcakes were so cute that I could just eat them all up. Seriously.. But, I brought back home. My friend scold me because I was eating 15 mini-cupcakes. MINI I tell you! Fine, maybe I was too overboard on the cupcakes. But who can deny such marvelous cupcakes?
~XOXOXO~
Just A Few Seconds In My Life
What does that mean? It is so clear.. Only a few seconds in my life, everything changes..
I just found out that I'm suffering from this heart disease thing.. Gah, its crazy. I didn't know it was that serious. Until I felt a pain on my chest everyday. I can't keep it any longer. I went to the doctor, and after a few tests, I was diagnose with this thing.. That doesn't mean I'm dying or what..
The only way to keep me survive is by medication. But its better to have an operation. I'm just scared if I did the operation, I might die faster. More risk.. Don't want to take it.. I'm not supposed to consume sugar, well just a little bit. Not in a large quantity..
Yeah, maybe that shows me something. Maybe I'm not gonna live that long but I'm gonna live life to the fullest. And that's a promise.. <3
I just found out that I'm suffering from this heart disease thing.. Gah, its crazy. I didn't know it was that serious. Until I felt a pain on my chest everyday. I can't keep it any longer. I went to the doctor, and after a few tests, I was diagnose with this thing.. That doesn't mean I'm dying or what..
The only way to keep me survive is by medication. But its better to have an operation. I'm just scared if I did the operation, I might die faster. More risk.. Don't want to take it.. I'm not supposed to consume sugar, well just a little bit. Not in a large quantity..
Yeah, maybe that shows me something. Maybe I'm not gonna live that long but I'm gonna live life to the fullest. And that's a promise.. <3
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Friends Are Meant To Be Forever
Hey yo!
Hmm, why am I talking about friendship right now? Because I wanted too! LOL!
I have A LOT of amazing friends. They are too amazing that I can't describe them at all. For example, my bestest girl friends (I love you guys till death!) Sorayya and Syiro. They are mean to me sometimes (all the time), but they are still the best for me. Everytime they scold me or get mad at me (yes, its my own fault -,-), I understand why they are doing that. They are like my sisters. Knows me the best and all!
Then my guy friends. Danial, Zaim, Zairul, Arif, Faizal and Din. There's a lot more but I'm just too lazy to type. Hehe. Well, I'm the closest with Danial. He knows me well and share some secrets that I never share with Sorayya (sorry bout that). Sorayya's mom said that me and Danial looks kinda same. Hmm, not quite agree on that. All I know is we have the same type of nose, I guess? Hmm, not sure. But, I'm the closest to him.
Well, like I said, friends are meant to be forever. Eventhough we fight almost everyday, we still have each other backs. Now that's a tight friendship! Hahaha! My one and only wish is I don't our friendship break, never at all! I love you guys so much!
~XOXOXOXO~
Hmm, why am I talking about friendship right now? Because I wanted too! LOL!
I have A LOT of amazing friends. They are too amazing that I can't describe them at all. For example, my bestest girl friends (I love you guys till death!) Sorayya and Syiro. They are mean to me sometimes (all the time), but they are still the best for me. Everytime they scold me or get mad at me (yes, its my own fault -,-), I understand why they are doing that. They are like my sisters. Knows me the best and all!
Then my guy friends. Danial, Zaim, Zairul, Arif, Faizal and Din. There's a lot more but I'm just too lazy to type. Hehe. Well, I'm the closest with Danial. He knows me well and share some secrets that I never share with Sorayya (sorry bout that). Sorayya's mom said that me and Danial looks kinda same. Hmm, not quite agree on that. All I know is we have the same type of nose, I guess? Hmm, not sure. But, I'm the closest to him.
Well, like I said, friends are meant to be forever. Eventhough we fight almost everyday, we still have each other backs. Now that's a tight friendship! Hahaha! My one and only wish is I don't our friendship break, never at all! I love you guys so much!
~XOXOXOXO~
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